No Football – Ruth Walters

When we first met we didn’t,
it wasn’t on the menu.
Of course it had me curious
I gave it much attention.

In April we indulged,
we were so very proud,
bouncing on the sofa
we did it in the lounge!

Later, in July
there was a time, I think
when we hit all the high notes
a few times by the sink.

In Autumn he got lazy
all this just had him spent
so I baked him pastries
and he ate those instead.

New Year was so merry
we drunk all Daddy’s Sherry
I think perhaps we did it,
I wasn’t really with it.

Last time was the best
and lasted quite a while
it was in Central Park
We had a bloomin’ lark.

These days we just don’t,
he’s got so fat and heavy,
except for when we’re bored
and no football’s on the telly.